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We need both stories that blatantly feature asexuality and its discovery — like a subplot of the New Zealand soap opera “Shortland Street,” in which a biromantic asexual man found his label on the Internet and explored what it meant — as well as stories that feature asexuality incidentally, like a one-off mention of asexuality spoken by a minor character on the American drama “Huge,” in which a camp counselor casually identified as asexual while watching a movie and described her aromanticism. We need “issue books” as well as asexual best friend characters and incidentally asexual romantic partners and specific but normalized inclusion of asexuality in all venues where sexual diversity would normally be discussed.
Julie Sondra Decker, through Tracy Clar-Flory, Salon | You’re about as sexually attractive to me as a turtle: Coming out as asexual in a hypersexual culture (via asexualquotes)

Anonymous asked:

I dunno if I should be IDing as Asexual because while I haven't experienced sexual attraction(as far as I can tell) I'm worried if I do I'm betraying the label type thing?


okay i’m just gonna say this right now: there is no such thing as “betraying the label”. a label is not finite, a label is not sacred, a label is not a permanent fixture whose definitions we must force ourselves to abide

labels are a tool that we use to describe ourselves at our discretion. labels are meant to describe our experiences, not the other way around. labels are not meant to place limits on our experiences

labels are not going to perfectly describe every little detail of our experience of sexuality. human sexuality is vast and fluid and diverse and unpredictable. you do not have to feel guilty for exploring your identity. you do not have to feel guilty if your sexuality changes. you do not have to feel guilty if you need to pick a new label

if you happen to feel sexual attraction someday, it is not “betraying the label”. if you happen to feel sexual attraction maybe once or twice, it is not “betraying the label”. you have chosen a label that describes what you feel right now and what you have felt thus far in your life, and that is completely valid; you don’t have to worry about defining what you might feel in the future, or if what you feel in the future doesn’t “match" your label

if you feel you are asexual, then you can call yourself asexual. you don’t have to worry about if it might change in the future, and you don’t have worry about policing your experiences so that they always fit the definition. be ace and be proud

~Mod Q

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